I think one of the hardest things about being a new parent is all the information that gets thrown your way. It seems like there is a book for everything and a million and one approaches to parenting. I get so daunted by all of the methods and approaches to child rearing, especially since I view a lot of them as ways to make a buck off of sleep deprived, stressed out parents.
That said, in the past week I've been reading The Baby Whisperer, The Sears Book of Sleep and even Tim's Be Prepared book for dads. Though I still feel like each of them has their own style that doesn't totally fit what we're into, it's good to get some tips from each source that work and make Story happy. Those, combined with some awesome moms I know who read this blog, has definitely made a good impact on Story in the first week at home.
One of the best things that's happened already is that she seems to actually like her crib. At first, we were co-sleeping with her and we were finding it to be a bit problematic. First off, it made me really nervous to have her hanging out in our bed, especially since I have been on pain meds for the c-section. Also, she seemed to be much fussier, crankier and prone to mixing up her night and day. But whenever we'd put her in her bassinette, she'd cry non-stop. Definitely no fun.
Our pediatrician suggested establishing a firm difference between night and day by having loud tv/activity on during the day and keeping the house dark and quiet at night. She also suggested letting her CIO (cry it out) in the crib until she fell asleep. I'll admit that I'm not too keen on that, even though it was how I was raised. So, we tried putting her in her crib and using some of the soothing methods we learned in Newborn Care class (swaddling, of which Tim is AMAZING at and shushing/white noise.) Then, Tim and I turned on the monitor and visited/soothed every time she woke up or started crying. Immediately, we noticed a huge difference. She has been happily going to sleep at night, sleeping for longer stretches each time and only waking up really for feedings. She also seems SO much happier during the day, being alert and playful. I think we were both really stressing her out/keeping her up too much with our "soothing" methods of bouncing, rocking, singing, etc. every time she woke up before.
It's definitely not perfect. She's a little person who has been thrown into this bizarre world, so she still wakes and needs soothing (or I have to wake her for feedings, which is so hard to do. She looks so sweet and precious, I just want to let her sleep... but a mom's gotta do what she's gotta do.) But it's amazing how she's gone from screaming/crying in large blocks during the day to being happy and alert.
However, we'll see how long this lasts. As I've said before, this parenting stuff seems like one giant experiment, so who knows if next week she'll be a totally different baby with a whole new set of rules :)
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2 comments:
Oh Brooke-lyn. I wish I had some great advice that would solve your problems. I have advice, but you're right, it might not be right for Story, or you. And, I felt so bombarded with well-meaning "advice" in the beginning (and still). What I figured after awhile was that everyone seemed to be guessing!! haha. I'm glad you're figuring out the crib thing and that she likes it. I found co-sleeping to be so difficult, B and I tended to keep each other up all night and it took awhile for me to realize it. Having him in the crib was such a sense of freedom for us!! And, most people have to go through the crib transition at some point, I thought it was so much easier to do it early. I also HATED the CIO idea, but also eventually found it to be my last option. And it worked fantastically. I didn't comment on your breakdown blog, because it was so emotional to go through that with you. I remember those moments so vividly. My most common question was, "when does this part end???" It will pass, you will feel like a person again. Hang in there!
Reading your blog (which I have just realized I can comment on!) it seems to me Tim and you have gotten a fix on a really healthy attitude for this rough patch . . . you are trying new things (even though it sounds like it's harder than one would think!) and you are trying to be open-minded-yet-filtered towards new information.
I keep remembering what you said about how no one is born hard-wired to be a parent, but it sounds like you and Tim are doing an extraordinary job proving otherwise.
Hope the lil bundle had a good night!
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